Black satin… Tuesday, Nov 17 2009 

…is the dress that I chose.  Although, I REALLY liked the origami dresses, when I got them in my size they boxed me in too much…I didn’t have a waist.   I could get it tailored, but I don’t feel like it. 

I felt beautiful in the black satin dress.  Everything was just right.  Yes I’m posing in the filing room…lol.  I haven’t replaced my digital camera yet, and my phone doesn’t give good light.   

I tasted mushroom stuffed with mandarin oranges.  I people watched…batted my lashes a few times.  We had a champagne toast and I headed home.  It was a lovely night.  (sidenote: Nene from RHOA was there.  She’s not as big as I thought. )

Weekend turn-out Tuesday, Nov 10 2009 

While at work on Friday my friend said “Kelly what’s wrong with your eyebrows…*crazy eyes* I don’t know which one to look at!!”  My brows were definitely growing in…it’d been about a month since I last had them down and I was trying to let them grow out a bit….again.  I hate her.  Friday night I had to attend choir rehearsal.   I made sure I wore my cap pulled really low so that my Einstein brows were obscured.  I do whats best for everyone involved.

I placed a SOS call for a “chuuuch” hat to my girl Dani….no avail.  So Saturday morning getting ready for church was HELL.  I didn’t twist my hair the night before…my attempted wash and go was a wash and NO.  I tried for a good 90 mins varying my hair trying to create a hair diversion that would again camoflauge those brows…(totally detached myself from them).  My ever loving girls were full of “eeewwwws” and “illlks” *sigh*  It did what it do and we skipped out.

That evening I attended a really nice off broadway show in Harlem, again wearing a hat that I could pull real low. I then made a bee line to fix those brows.  She took a while.  I knew she had some work to do, but when I sat up and looked in the mirror (more…)

Thank You Blog Buddies!!! Monday, Nov 9 2009 

I think I have the most generous blog buddies around!  Xmas came early went I went to the post office this weekend.  I received this treasure from Nerd Girl

Queens

I love it.  It’s just a coincidence that I’m on this natural hair journey and she chose this as her give-away.   I haven’t read it all, but I can’t wait to.  I’ve skimmed through it,  and the second pic really stood out to me.

 

 

Then I was really surprised when I received this from S23. 

She told me that she thinks I’m going to like it and she is soooo right.  When T was little I started a lil journal for her.  I always felt like if I died young I wanted her to have words that I wrote specifically for her.  Morbid???  Well…that’s what I wanted.  This book is not exactly like that, but its absolutely something that the girls would treasure.

Thank you gals!!! I really have some of the best blog buddies around…TM send me a REALLY helpful package months ago, and maybe two weeks ago I received something from Pserendipity.  Ya’ll the best ! :-)

I don’t take the generosity that I’ve received lightly.  Rest assured that I’ll be paying it forward very soon…stay tuned and get to de-lurking..lurkers!

Daddy does Friday, Nov 6 2009 

I shared with my co-worker yesterday that at 2:50am Thursday morning fire fighters were in my hallway making a whole lotta noise.  It startled me and I leaped up half delirious/half  panicked.  Thankfully it really wasn’t an emergency.  When I was like 7 yrs old I vividly recall a fire being one my biggest fears.  Why I carried that weight at that age who knows.  I strategized in my mind having a suitcase ready with my favorite clothes and dolls in it just in case.  Sharing that memory made me also recall feeling really protected as a kid — for a time.

My father was a cop and my mother is a nurse.  I would lay in bed and pluck my eyelashes out.  That’s not at all relevant, but it just came to mind and I can’t believe I used to do that; to the point where my eyelids were raw.  Ok, so back on track…I analyzed that I was protected because my father was a cop and he would protect us, but if anything SHOULD happen my mom is a nurse so she’ll fix it.  My critical thinking skills were developing way back then.

Unfortunately, I grew up without the stability of feeling that my father would protect me.  He wasn’t around.  That has had a profound effect on how I handle situations.  Although my mom was around,  she wasn’t the protective one in my head.  She was the healer.    So if something happened in school I went hard advocating for myself…fights in school…debates in class.   The reality is I’m thin-skinned, but I will protect myself at all costs and others who I believe also need defending.  I wonder if he chose to be involved if he would have seen that trait in me and molded me to have a more secure protective layer knowing that he wouldn’t be able to be around all the time, yet knowing that I would need it.  I think that’s what Dad’s do.

Letter from Roscoe Thursday, Nov 5 2009 

I was greeted by this on the dining room table last night when I came home from school…..tired.roscoe

 I’mma need Bird to get off my  back…lol.  I’m not even sure what she’s talking about.  Ok…I may have not reviewed her work Monday night.  I think it was because they didn’t have school on Tuesday and they were in chillax mode.  The bad news is I forgot to give her $ for the book fair this morning…but she did too, so who’s fault is that??  Huh?? *sigh*

I did check her work last night.  I made a few highlightss that she corrected this morning. 

The girls REALLLY keep me on my toes.  I think I do a good job, but they are great about reminding me of things that I may let fall through the cracks simply because there is just soooo much on my mind. 

Just yesterday T reminded me to remind her pick-up that she won’t be out of school until 5:00pm due to Xmas show rehearsals.  I really do appreciate those reminders because I would surely forget.  Her pick up would arrive at 2:55 and then I’d have to apologize profusely.

My 2 cents Friday, Oct 30 2009 

That B12 vitamin is the B.Izness.  I feel a NOTICEABLE difference when I take it.  I say go get that.  I purchased it from Vita.min Shopp.e

What kind of mascara do you wear? I normally where Lancome Definicils…it’s great, but a lil on the pricey side.  I decided to try Stiletto by May.bel.line.  I’m not impressed…not even a lil bit.  You would think with a name like Stiletto! Thumbs down…I like full lashes and this is just a tease. stiletto

I purchased Deva Set it Free over the weekend.  When I first used it on dry hair I hated it.  It felt very tacky, but when I woke up I had good, shiny, defined curls.  I even got great results on 2nd day without re-twisting.  setitfree

I used it again Wednesday night.  This time I deep conditioned my hair and applied it to my wet hair after I rinsed out the conditioner.  I LOOOOOVE IT!  I’m working on 3 day hair right now, without re-twisting AND I got a hair compliment this morning…can you believe it?  This is a keeper.3dayfro

His voice Wednesday, Oct 28 2009 

Last week I was a bit shook up at work when I received an email from my office manager.  I had already received my evaluation so it couldn’t be that.  My mind went to the worse case scenario.  People have been getting laid off here and there…quietly.  At that moment I said to God…”you didn’t tell me about this”.  

I was 18 years old, and  I worked for a very small stationary company as an accounts payable clerk.  There was alot of crap that went on in that office.  People yelling and arguing back and forth.  It made me so uncomfortable.  I stayed because my mother told me to just ignore it, and I knew I had a bigger goal.  I remember bringing home $210 every week.  I was RICH! 

I got ready for work that morning, sitting on the edge of my bed I reached for my underwear drawer and God said “You’re going to be fired today”.  I did a scooby doo “ahruuuuu”…I let it sit for 3 seconds and then I continued getting myself together.  When Mr.  Unz called “Kelly…come here” it hit me again and I knew what was coming.  I wasn’t on probation…I had never received a warning….I hadn’t screwed up anything, but I knew what was coming.  The whole way home I kept saying to myself “I KNEW IT“…I was amazed.

It was 2005.  I had to drive 30 mins (w/traffic) every morning to bring the girls to school.   They loaded in the back seat – knowing the rules they buckled up.  I was getting myself situated when God said “You’re going to be in a car accident this morning”.  No scooby doo this time, but I let what I just heard marinate for 2 seconds.  I then turned to the girls and said “Are your seatbelts on?” They said answered yes and I said “are you sure?“  T raised her brow at me…she was 7 years old…not much as changed.  I insisted they pull their belts tight just to be sure.  My seatbelt was secured, but I thought “well let me pull my seat back…if the airbag deplows I don’t want my face to get messed up“.  I did all that and then set on my way.  I dropped the girls off at school and then headed to where I park the car so that I could jump on my bus.  I was 2 minutes away from my parking spot.  I headed towards my green light when I was slammed into by a car trying to make a quick left turn before I reached the intersection.  Her timing placed her front fender right where my front tire and door were.  With my head resting on my steering wheel I said “This is it“. 

I had taken extra precautions when I heard the voice, but it wasn’t a dark cloud weighing over my head.  I wasn’t waiting for this major car crash to come, but here it was.  We both walked away unharmed.  There was damage to my vehicle, but it was repaired.  I shared this account with someone once and I was asked “well why did you drive that day?“.  I drove because I wasn’t told NOT to drive…I was simply warned.   However, if I had not driven that day how would I know that that was really His voice speaking to me?  How would I know that His hand that purposefully kept me from harm?  How could I build on my personal experience that He knows the beginning from the end and that sometimes he’ll let me in on what he knows, so that I can understand that He’s got my back?

There have been several times when I’ve had similar occurances.  As a result of my experiences I have become very careful when I hear His voice cautioning me.   I encourage you to develop your ear so that it is in tune with his voice.  God speaks.

It wasn’t the worst case scenario, but I am NOT happy about the change.  I do know that He has my back come what may.

B12 Wednesday, Oct 21 2009 

I just purchased today.  I’ll give a proper review in a week.  Something has to give.

Weekend Turn-out Monday, Oct 12 2009 

My massage was a big disappointment. It wass my fault tho…I didn’t request the guy who rocked my world.  This woman talked through it.  I pointed out a cut on my ankle so she’d be careful…she asked me how I got it, I explained I got it during my excursion in Cancun.  Then she asked if my vacation was expensive..smh.  When I was trying to relax I heard her stomach grumble.  Every so often it seems as though she was gasping for air…was she asthmatic?  I kept wishing it was over.   She sat on the edge of the table a few times.  She had no real technique other than just rubbing.   Unfortunately, for me it was a waste. 

I had a mouse in my house…I won’t tell you how I screamed and carried on, and I won’t tell you that when I took my mom to embark on her cruise the girls called me in sheer hysteria.  I also won’t mention that I was secretly glad that I wasn’t home.

I will say that the guy that I’ve been getting to know saved the day.  The girls jumped ship…they were like “We’re going to Daddy’s house and not coming back until it’s gone“  I don’t blame them at all.  I have a cat named Boots.  Boots was about her b.i.zness, but this game was taking too long.  Before my friend left last night I had him do some more checking.   He killed it, I was glad and then he felt bad. Oh well.  IT’S DEAD and now I can rest easy.  Rest easy is just what I did.  So much so that I woke up an hour late this morning.  I didn’t even rush.  I took my time.  That rest was much needed.

On Saturday my girls got baptized.  I was  SUPER PROUD MAMA! We’ve had a crusade going on at the church for 3 weeks.  The first week they asked parents to bring their young children.  I took the girls up…I didn’t realize it was for baptism.  T wasn’t having it.  I talked to her for a bit about the importance of this decision.  She listened and said no..so I left it alone.  The following Sabbath, she said..”Mommy I’m going to get baptized next week”.  I gave her a BRIGHT smile..and she said “don’t smile at me”…lol.  So Sabbath came…Bird decided she wanted to do it too.  We were in the back so that they could change into their baptismal robes.  T started to feel anxious and she wanted to renege.  Anxious went to panic with her shaking her head saying no.  Then she says to me “I’m not ready…you made me do it” *insert OH NO YOU DIDN’T JUST SAY THAT face*.  I leaned in and said “I never forced you to do this…we talked about it..you said no and I left it alone”“But I kept thinking about it” “Well if you were thinking about it then that is the Holy Spirit speaking…is the Holy Spirit STILL speaking to you?” *silence*  I then asked Bird if she still wanted to do it if T didn’t do it.  She got very emotional and cried in her hands. She didn’t answer, but her actions told me that she really wanted to do it, but she wanted to do it with her sister.  I left her alone with her thoughts and I prayed for her.  At the end of the service she was ready.

(I cut the video short because afterwards I couldn’t get any footage past that dang blue blanket.  I later found out that sometimes when they go down womens underparts are exposed so they use the blanket for privacy.)

T was SOOOOOO HAPPY! She kept saying “I feel sooo goood! I’m soo happy we made the right choice!”  Bird was happy as well.  As a mom I was overwhelmed with joy.

Foot-in-mouth Monday, Oct 5 2009 

Friday night R’s sister called from ATL to say hey. I hadn’t spoken to her in awhile so I was happy to hear from her. I asked her about her pregnancy. Then I wanted to swallow my own tongue when she said she lost the baby. Not only that, but it took her a couple of mins to believe that I REALLY didn’t know.  I had to ask her if you did tell me, then what was my response?? THEN she realized that she hadn’t spoken to me.  She spoke to R and told him to tell me.

She went on to tell me what happened while I listened quietly.  I just kept thinking…”It SUCKS to be me right now”.   I felt awful.   She says she’s doing fine.  It happened awhile ago so she has had some time to deal…the hubby took it harder.  Geesh.

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