Thanks winter

NY has had more snow in January than in the past 3 years….it seems.

I don’t shovel snow.  It’s hard to look fabulous while shoveling snow.  R came by this morning* and shoveled the car out.  I was beyond grateful, especially since the car was pretty much buried.  (*I’ve been trying to post this since Thursday.)

GO R GO!!!!  That is I95 in the background…lol  Wave hello if you ever drive through.

It is illegal for snow to be shoveled back into the street, but where else is it supposed to go???????

Before long, it’ll look just like this

Game ON!

Ok, so with the latest tomfoolery, I’m on a mission.  I get crazy…regularly.  Each and every time I get crazy, I’mma take that crazy and raise that crazy…with CRAZY.  I think that’s all that crazy people understand.  They understand ignorant behavior.

For the life of me, I do not understand why men in my age group don’t approach me.  I get Mr. AARP.  At first I thought this kid tryna holla was an all time low.  I might have it all wrong, maybe I’m on the come up??

Remember this dude?  Surely the kid isn’t as much of a shot to the ego as him.

It does make for good blog content.

I got your crazy

Last night I walked by a young boy, maybe 12 years old….down coat unzipped…book bag hanging from the crook of his arms…hitting the bag of his legs as he walked.  As I walked by he said “heyyyyy sexy.”  It was almost in a whisper.  I turned around *insert totally confused screw face*

Me: What did you just say??

Him: *eyes stretched*

If I didn’t know better I would think I imagined it all.  If you saw him, you would think I was lying.

Me: What did you say??

He’s looking back and me, then starts to run

Me: WHY YOU RUNNIN’?  I WANT YOUR NUMBA!!

From now on, I’m returning crazy with crazy.

When is the last time you were called sexy by a 12 year old? *popping my collar*

Every coin has two sides

I knocked on her mom’s door Saturday night.  THAT LADY IS PISSSSSSSED!  She was all “uh uh SISTA!”  I asked if HG got a job, and could contribute if she would let her in.  That’s when I got ”uh uh SISTA!”  HG was with me.  She kept walking away from the door when I had more questions.  I felt like a reporter doing an expose’.  I wanted to know if there were any friends or family that could take her in.  This lady really couldn’t care less.

She asked me if I ever cursed my mother out, or if I ever fought with her. NO and NO.  Anyway, she has washed her hand with HG. THE END.  I talked to HG about it.  She said that her mom is spiteful.  This is her adoptive mother.  When she left for good, she yelled out “WHY DON’T YOU GO LIVE WITH DAVID.”  David is her biological father.  I don’t think she’s seen him since she was 6.  There’s alot of grudges and anger.  Either way I don’t agree with her poor decisions.

She still loves her mother, and wants to know if she’ll ever speak to her again.  I don’t know.

Her sister gave me a short list of family that might allow her to stay with them.  She doesn’t want me to call anyone on that list. She says she doesn’t know them.

Geez

 

Now what?

Greg G (10:44 PM):  Hey

Greg G (10:44 PM):  How are u?

Kelly (10:44 PM):  I’m good, how are you?

Greg G (10:45 PM):  Same ol

Greg G (10:45 PM):  Work work and work

Kelly (10:45 PM):  I’m sure…with this weather especially…i can relate

Greg G (10:46 PM):  Yep

Greg G (10:46 PM):  So what’s new with u

Kelly (10:47 PM):  not a thang

Kelly (10:47 PM):  school school and school

Kelly (10:48 PM):  i’m applying to law schools right now

Greg G (10:49 PM):  Nice nice

Greg G (10:49 PM):  How was your Christmas

Kelly (10:50 PM):  Xmas was ok….for the kids

Greg G (10:50 PM):  Lol@for the kids

Greg G (10:51 PM):  How’s dating life?

Kelly (10:51 PM):  non-existent

Kelly (10:51 PM):  almost non-existent

Greg G (10:51 PM):  I want another date with u

Kelly (10:52 PM):  At this point I don’t want to date for sport

Greg G (10:52 PM):  It’s not for sport

Kelly (10:54 PM):  I would only date someone who I think would be and who would want to be a good husband for me

Greg G (10:55 PM):  Ok but u can’t determine that without being around that person and dating a few times

Greg G (10:56 PM):  I’m looking for long term as well

Kelly (10:56 PM):  you believe in open marriages dude

Greg G (10:56 PM):  I said I don’t knock it down

Greg G (10:56 PM):  Is it what I want? No

Greg G (10:57 PM):  But for some ppl it’s what’s best for them

Greg G (10:57 PM):  I don’t like to tell ppl how to live their lives nor do I like anyone else to judge or tell others how to live their life

Kelly (10:58 PM):  understood

Greg G (11:00 PM):  So when are u available?

Greg G (11:00 PM):  I’m off tomorrow and Thursday

Ok, so do I give him a LIST of alll of the qualities that I know makes him unfit for me???????

Catch up on da random vlog style

Santa baby — A good day and I loved my hair!

Thanksgiving

As nervous as I was, it all turned out great.  The turkey was the bestest!  I’ve been queened.  I brined the turkey and that was key.  What wasn’t cool was my kitchen and bathroom sink clogging because the pipes couldn’t handle the herbs.

After we were nice and full we played taboo.  I wouldn’t say I’m a taboo queen, but I am.  I explained the directions and we hit the ground running.  I went first, and my brother’s fiancee sat next to me with the buzzer being on the opposing team.  I was killin’ them.  We got 6 cards despite a couple of hiccups.  When I finished this chick went bananas.  She’s laughing but she’s screaming “YOU CHEATED, OMG, THAT’S NOT FAIR BLAH BLAH”  That would not have been so bad, but she was pointing her finger in my face.  My instinct rose and then I froze, like a deer caught in headlights.  My mental rolodex on overdrive could not give me anything else OTHER than my natural instinct, so I did nothing.  NOTHING.  All eyes are on us, everyone’s laughing and jolly, and I did nothing because what I wanted to do would have been “over-reacting” *sigh*

Then it was her turn.  I next to her with buzzer in hand.  She started off reading every.last.word, that I explained could not be said, so she got BUZZZZZZZZ – BUZZZZZZZZZ – BUZZZZZZZZZZ!!!  We all laugh – our round is up, I got up to walk away and she says YOU’RE A CHEATER – HAHAHAHA- and slaps me on my arm. SAYWHA??  I’m not laughing *insert blank stare*  I had had enough.

Part of this is my fault.  Most people have to be treated like everybody else until they prove that it should be otherwise. Although our encounters were brief, I embraced her.  I should have been cautious and cordial.  She should have been treated like everybody else.  I love my family, and thankfully we don’t have inner bickering, so it was natural for me to embrace her the way that I did.  I treated her the same way R’s sisters treated me.  I can’t recall them ever referring to me as an “in-law”…ever. I extended the same, but too soon.  I’m not saying she isn’t cool.  She may still be.  She came into this situation being very pushy…aggressive.  My aunt said she seems like someone who is just trying to fit in, and she’s young.  That’s fine.

I contacted her right after and said that I’d like to have her over again soon.  This time we’re going to get to really know each other.

The night ended like this 

Is it me?

For a good while I was ok with being single.  I’m a busy woman, and my life is full.  I’m not content with that anymore…right now.  Is it because cold weather is setting in soon?

For the life of me I don’t understand why men in my age group don’t approach me.  They look, we exchange glances, but they don’t say a word.  I’ve even started to use that hold your gaze for a few seconds technique.  That’s supposed to let a man know if he approaches you that he won’t be rejected.  I tried that in Target this morning.  There was this nice looking guy.  We were parallel as we were passing aisles.  Our eyes kept meeting as we decided if we needed anything down that aisle.  I was on my phone with my bff…I told her buh bye.  This man can’t possibly approach me if I’m running my pie hole on the phone right? RIGHT!

I didn’t see him anymore so I supposed that he got what he needed and left.  Then I see him again.  My items are being rung up, and so are his.  He finishes first…I’m hoping that maybe he’ll slow his stride and perhaps we’ll encounter each other outside of the store.  *sigh* That didn’t happen.

BUT THIS DID

I ride the elevator up to the 3rd level where I parked. This elder Target employee says something about taking my cart..I don’t understand him completely because he has a HEAVY caribbean accent.  I smile and say ok.  Load my car.  Give him the cart. He says “thanks.”  I say “you’re welcome.”  I head back to the elevator to ride back down and get a latte.  He says something about the carts riding with me in the elevator. I’m nodding and smiling..”sure.”  Get my latte. Head back to my car. I pass him and say “Thank you *showing all 32*, have a great day”  He says “I love your sweet lips” *BLINKBLINKBLINK* uh….really? As in OLD MAN….REALLY?!?!?!? He says “REALLY”

This is surely going to lead me to develop issues.

 

My left foot…better than chocolate.

I tried a new spa on Friday.  I use to have the dopest masseuse ever, but he’s not at my spa anymore.  I’ll never let another get away.  I’m taking down numbers, your address, your website, baby mama or baby daddy numbers.  No more up and disappearing without me knowing.  Since then, when I can I try a new spa and pray that he/she is as good as Sass. Fail.Fail.Fail.  Friday was no different…kinda.  Part of really enjoying the spa experience is the ambiance.  This place lacked that.  They didn’t have a nice separate room where I could change.  I didn’t like that.  The massage room was decorated fairly nice but there were scuff marks all along the walls.  Not tranquil.

It’s been my experience that each masseuse has his or her own bag of tricks.  The kind that make me  go “nice…where’d you learn that?” in my head.  Even if all around they aren’t the best.  She was by far not the best I’ve ever had.  All of her moves were really boring, except when she got to my feet.  She did my left foot, rubbing up and down, up and down. Out of nowhere it caused such an arou….I think I had an orga…it was sooo intense.  Whatindawhurl was that???!!!  Never in my life….never in my life!  Who knew that pressure points were that serious.  Look…if I could get that kinda foot rub weekly, abstinence would be a breeze.

Magnets

I was talking to a couple of friends today.  One is cop and she was sharing some of her crazy on/off the job stories.  She was on the bus, and this guy was dry h/umping this lady who kept yelping and trying to get away.  She goes over to help (she must have been off the job) when this other guy reaches the lady first and throws the guy in a headlock.  They held the guy…waited for the cops to come, and consoled the lady.  The back of her shirt was wet.  ewwww.  I have no way of knowing this lady’s make up.  I do know that there are certain things that seem to happen to certain people.  Sometimes these kinda things happen repeatedly…it’s like they’re magnets.  This would have NEVER happened to me.  I feel pretty confident saying that there’s no way that a man is gonna chase me so that he can dry h/ump me.

We discuss the story more, she says she’d have to break up with him if he splashes from dry h/umping.  She’s a fool.

I watched the big O and saw her interview with TP.  If you saw it you’d know that he shared details about being molested by 3 people and physically brutalized by his father.  It made me think…3 different people??  How does that happen…to ONE person? Same thing with the big O…molested by at least 2 people.  The stories are awful but what makes a child a target for the same.thing. by more than one person?

One of my things are being hit.  Sitting in my car..not moving/or moving and being hit.  I’ve had two people hit me and run. One in front of a bunch of cops.  I’m screaming them telling them to radio the other cop…she was headed in his direction, but apparently I was speaking greek.  Some people NEVER have a car accident..not me.

I’ve also been called the ‘n’ word.  Three different times.  The first time was when I visited an aunt in upstate new york.  She lived in a complex with a community pool.  I’m about 9 years old…splashing around, and having a good time.  When a lil white boy says it.  I remember me chasing him around the pool over and over.  I wanted to kill him.  It was totally unprovoked.  Has that ever happened to you?  Maybe…maybe not..but it happens to me.  Another time it happened while I was at work.  Some dude called looking for someone I’d never heard of.  I tell him, and then let him know that I’d help him..somewhere the convo went way wrong.  It was like this dude turned into Satan.  One minute I’m asking him if he knew what department this person worked in, the next he’s calling me a n-b$%ch and hangs up the phone.  I’m a hot head, but I do my best to cool it at work.  I DID.  But of course I was very upset like anyone else would be simply because there was nothing that I could do about it.    I’m one of those who doesn’t get upset when I hear my kind using it.  I don’t like hearing it yelled all obnoxiously in public…BUT among my own kind it doesn’t bother me.  In this instance it would have served me best..for me…if I didn’t let it hold so much power.

If I called my mother tonight and said “GUESS WHAT?” She’d say “what…somebody called you a ‘N’?”